An Engineer’s Guide to Saying No

😳 Saying no without sounding like a jerk

As an engineer, you build at lightning speed, deal with changing scopes, and put out fires quickly. But lately, you’re hacking past working hours, and you’re still behind on the roadmap.

You probably learned to team-please before management was part of the question. Now, your difficulty with saying “no” is getting in your way.

🙅 5 types of no

“No” isn’t about shutting projects and people down. In fact, it helps keep your team and goals on track. Here are 5 types of “no” you can use at work:

1. The Pause 🧘
2. The Agreement 🤝
3. The Commitment 🔐
4. The Allotment 🗳️
5. The Twist 🔀

Let’s dive into each one!

1. The Pause 🧘

When people are racing ahead to get things done, but haven’t thought through what’s actually required, take a pause. According to Michael Lopp - Author of Managing Humans - this forces everyone to be more strategic.

You can say:

Let’s take a step back and map out what needs to be done. We can’t commit to anything until we have a clear understanding of the task.

2. The Agreement 🤝

When someone proposes a good idea, but project timelines need to be shifted, agree in principle - then address the timeline. Camille Fournier, Author of The Manager’s Path, says this keeps your stakeholders happy and your deadlines realistic.

You can say:

Let’s prioritize this, and park the project we talked about last week. We can’t fit both. This will have a bigger impact.

3. The Commitment 🔐

When you have too many things on your plate, Alex Weber, the Chief Growth Officer at N26, says to never over-promise. Instead, show your team that you’re true to your word.

You can say:

Realistically, I can’t take this on because I wouldn’t be doing it justice. I’m already working on the migration.

4. The Allotment 🗳️

When you’re maxed out and the new task doesn’t fit, Charles Ahmadzadeh, Bunch Co-Founder and former CTO, says to share how long each task will take.

You can say:

The feature I’m working on will take another 3 hours. I also have a bug fix that’ll take 45 minutes, and a refactor for 4 hours. What you’re asking me to do won’t fit.

Now when you say no, you can justify it.

5. The Twist 🔀

You're already swamped but people are throwing ideas at you that won't fit. In situations like these, Stever Robbins, serial entrepreneur and Co-Founder of FTP Software, says don't just say no, ask a question.

You can say:

I think that’s a good idea, but it doesn’t fit in the roadmap as is. What if it looked like this?

This helps everyone stay open to new opportunities, without stretching yourself too thin.

🏆 Make “no” part of your legacy

The more effectively we use “no,” the more power we have to reach goals, stick to deadlines, and build trust in the team.

The next time someone asks you to do something, instead of jumping to accommodate their priorities and potentially putting other things at risk, remember the power “no” holds.